2.20.2011

I'm so proud of...ME!

Not only did I 'survive' my Dad's memorial service...I feel like I triumphed! No, it wasn't a contest...I just didn't let the negative stuff win. It was important to me to model the most appropriate behavior, both for my kids AND for myself.

Yes, my step-sister was irritating as fuck, but I didn't say a mean word to her. I was able to give my eulogy, and it was good. Good to say the truth without insulting anyone...good to have people acknowledge that I knew things about my father that they didn't know. Good to speak clearly to my brothers about how I saw things, and that there was room for them to disagree, but I wasn't changing my opinion. Yes, I was proud of me. When you consider all the routes I could have taken, all the things I could have done that would allow me to continue to beat myself up...well, I'm just proud of me!

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